Sometimes We Need a Shift

Last week, I was talking with my bestie, Kim, who lives in Michigan.  I was sharing the woes of my sons not listening, not being motivated very easily, and my getting frustrated.  We had started a chart for them for their weekend screen time, crossing out fifteen minutes at a time when they were not making good choices with their obedience or attitude, etc.  Kim wisely suggested, "Why don't you turn it around to be a system of EARNING screen time instead of taking it away??"  And of course, I thought, why have we never thought of this before?!  But that is why we need friends...to share our stories, big and small, and let them give us different perspectives.

You guys, I had to hop onto the computer this morning to quickly share that the past three days of my life have been completely different!!!!  And I am not kidding!!!  We hung little charts on the wall for Micah and Samuel (and when I say "chart," I mean a sheet of paper with their name written on the top with a sharpee marker...nothing fancy) and told them that every time we caught them obeying quickly, helping with something around the house, or showing kindness, we would give them a star on their chart.  Each star would equal 10 minutes of screen time and they can earn up to 200 minutes maximum (100 for Saturday, 100 for Sunday).  This is a bit more than we had otherwise been planning, but we wanted the incentive to be exciting and make sense number-wise, too.

Immediately Monday morning, the boys unloaded the dishwasher without being asked.  When I said it was time to start math, they got out their books and started right away.  The past three days, they have literally been looking for ways to earn stars.  At this moment, they are loading the dishwasher with dirty dishes from breakfast (and I never asked them to).  As I was toasting bread for breakfast, they rushed to fill cups with water and orange juice and asked me, "What do you want to drink for breakfast, Mommy?"  Seriously.  They have worked hard at their schooling, they have helped with their chores, and they have sought to help each other.  It has been glorious.

Overnight, our home became more positive, more encouraging.  The kids are cheering for the boys when they earn stars and instead of me groaning and taking minutes away from their screen time, I get to be their cheerleader instead.

Maybe this will only last a few days or a few weeks.  I'll TAKE IT!  It is awesome to watch them excited and motivated to obey, and I am SO grateful for that conversation with my friend who had the wisdom to suggest I change things up.

Sometimes, all it takes is a little shift.  A little shift in perspective or a shift in practice.  Sometimes we just need to start something over or start something new to focus our hearts and our attitudes on what matters.  And it makes all the difference.

So here's to a new day, a fresh start, a new tactic!  May it bring joy to your day, friends!

And I am off to school my boys, who I'm sure will be eager to do their math with a good attitude and earn another star!!

Cheers!