Summer Gifts

Last week I hit a rut.

I started feeling tired and worn out, struggling to have the joy that usually marks my days, reaching to find the perspective I want to have.  During these few days of being "off," I really tried hard to talk it through with my husband, to pray for a renewal of my mind, and to once again practice naming my gifts.

I really and truly believe that Ann Voskamp has it exactly right about true life and joy and peace coming from the simple act of giving thanks, naming gifts, being obedient to notice the grace around us and turning right back to God to give him the glory.

During my rut-days, I had a hard time doing this, and as I have practiced and practiced naming these gifts since then, I am being restored to a place of joy and perspective.  Ahh, what a relief.

Yesterday was one of those summer-loving days that made it easy to find gifts to name.

After dropping off my oldest at our church's VBS, I met my mom and sister at a local Farmer's Market.  Colors and smiles and fresh produce were everywhere around, and I couldn't help but get drawn in to the wonderful atmosphere, thankful to be alive and thankful to have such a simple and wonderful summer experience with my children.

We stopped at the booth of a local baker who happens to make dairy-free cookies for Sammy.  JOY!  He was so excited to have a chocolate cookie he could eat (although he ended up not liking it...sigh!).

We also visited the flower booth where you can create your own bouquet for $5...it was SO fun to see my children surrounded by colorful flowers all around, soaking it in and learning how to appreciate beauty.  They helped me create a bouquet to take home, and my heart was bursting...

After picking out tomatoes and green beans and cucumbers and ears of corn (most of which we consumed that evening for dinner!), we ducked into the Starbucks for a break from the relentless heat and a snack time for the kiddos (and iced drinks for the mamas!!)...

We all had lunch together, too, after I picked up Micah, and I still loved the happy chaos, even though I was definitely living in the reality of my mama life, attempting to eat salad over my nursing baby when my toddler holds fingers out to me covered in something quite awful from inside her diaper...so after a diaper fiasco with both girls and about a half hour in the bathroom, I emerged once again, laughing that this is my life (and definitely way too busy to even know where my camera was, much less take pictures of the moment).  

After an already-wonderful summer day, the joy kept coming as my parents spontaneously joined us for dinner and we sat and enjoyed burgers on the grill along with some of our delicious fresh vegetable treats from the Market.  And to top it all off, Zach surprised me by bringing home a movie (which is one of my favorite ways to end the day).  

All throughout my day, I inwardly kept noting the gifts, the beauty, the joy all around me...home-grown tomatoes, friendly farmers, fresh flowers in buckets, colors bursting, sun shining, babies smiling, sweet, crunchy popcorn, iced caramel coffees, lunchtime salads, giggling cousins, cookie crumbs on a summer dress, toddler hand fitting in mine, fresh diapers, family gathered around the table, prayers from children's lips...grace, grace, GRACE given in the beauty of life all around us, if we will only just notice and take the time to name it and give praise to the most magnificent of Creators, the one from whom all blessings flow.

Oh, the joys of summer days!!  Thank you, Jesus.

Thankful Thursday

Today I will keep this short and sweet.

I am thankful that, at the end of a day where I didn't feel myself, where I couldn't get a great perspective or the desired amount of motivation to tackle the tasks I wanted to accomplish, I had exactly what I needed...a break.  Zach and I tucked our kids into bed in shifts, I quickly made up a batch of guacamole, we threw in a pizza, ran and got a Redbox, and poured cans of Coke into wine glasses.  We snuggled into the couch and ate and laughed and RESTED.  We made sundaes and talked through the emotions and struggles and questions of life...the way life sometimes seems so much bigger than we are, and the ways in which we long to stay present in the one thing we are currently doing, always with the strength and grace of God.

This is how I ended the day, and it was exactly what I needed.

So although we have many other blessings to name, tonight, I am thankful for rest...for movies...for Coke in wine glasses...for a husband who listens to me so well...and for the constant new mercies we receive every day.

What are you thankful for today?

It Takes A Village

I have realized that sometimes I pridefully want the world to think that I can do it on my own.

Lots of other people have opinions about our family and the choices we've made...four kids five and under living in a small house on one, modest income, planning to homeschool, and planning to have more kids is a set of circumstances that others often question.  So at times, instead of confidently making our choices and not carrying others' thoughts on the matter, I want to prove to [the collective] them that I can do it.  

On my own.  

And well.

Oh, how mistaken I have been.

I am realizing more and more that it takes a village.

We have found a good rhythm of raising our children, doing fun activities, and figuring out how to make it work to meet everyone's needs at the same time.  We have found ways to love them all and care for them all, but sometimes, it is a blessing to let others step in and help.  Hold a baby.  Chase a toddler.  Take an older one for a walk or an outing. 

Today my four littles and I packed our bags and our lunches and headed to the park and splashpad for the day to meet a bunch of other mamas for a playdate.  Throughout the four hours we were there, there were many others lending their hands to help mine.  And for this, I am grateful.  My sister gave my roaming daughter snacks, my mom held my baby and gave my arms a break pushing my beast of a double stroller, and one of my closest mommy friends helped chase and corral my busy busy Ella around the park, sometimes spotting her or grabbing her even before I could.  Moms from church kept a watchful eye on one when I needed to dart off for another, and so went the routine of others helping, blessing me, humbling me that I do not need to do it on my own.

I drove away (after my friend waited for me to walk to the car together and then got my son out of his hiding place for me so I could tend to my crying baby) and wanted to cry thinking of what amazing support I have for this journey I am on.  YES I can take care of my children and YES I can do what I need to do, but YES YES YES is life more full and wonderful and am I more blessed and humbled when I let others help me along the way.

So I will choose to keep remembering that it takes a village.

my dear friend walking with my Ella

some of my village

 And just a couple fun pics from our romp around the pond...

Summer in Minnesota

Every summer we travel up to the Twin Cities for a visit.

I love Minnesota for many reasons...For one, I went to college there and I have such fond memories of my wonderful college years.  Also, this is where I met my husband and where we lived for our first year of marriage.  And it is where much of our family and several of our dear friends live that we like to catch up with.  It remains, as well, just a beautiful place to be.

Throughout the years, it has gotten harder to do everything and go everywhere and see everyone we want to see.  We have added children to our family and want to squeeze as much Grandma and Grandpa time out of being there, and we have to attempt to be home for naps and bedtimes, etc.  So we don't cram as much in as we used it, but we still have a great time.  This year was no exception as we filled our days with fun activities and enjoyed time with people we love.

We spent the afternoon at a family reunion, had many meals with family and friends, went to the beach and the playplace, had a date, took the boys to fireworks, ate ice cream, and had a family barbeque.  We sat outside and soaked up the beautiful weather, chased our children all around my in-laws' yard in the woods, and had great laughs and conversations with people who have been a part of our stories and our hearts...including a 90-year old great aunt, distant cousins, my college roommate and best friend, my dear friend I traveled abroad with in college, and my close friend who I have walked the mothering road with for six years now.  We met some new people and treasured time with the old.  My gracious in-laws took care of us and let us take over their house as we came and went, sometimes rushing out, sometimes settling in, capturing moments with the kids as often as they could.  It really was lovely.

Although I am rooted in Illinois, a part of me feels right at home in Minnesota, too, and for this, I am thankful.

Fourth of July 

Dentist Visits with Dr. Grandpa!

Our dear Minnesota friends...our four and their four

Beach Time!

Hide-and-go-seek

Four Generations!

We Love Minnesota!

Thankful Thursday

Today, I am thankful for being in Minnesota, for time to connect with family and old friends.  I am thankful for a fun drive together in the car, for the Schmidt Family Reunion out in the country where we got to visit with second cousins and third cousins and cousins once and twice removed, for a playdate with my dear friend and her kids, for lunch at my sister-in-law's, for a brunch with my college roommate, and for a date night gifted to us (including babysitting) from my in-laws.  Thankful for time spent with grandparents who adore their grandchildren and are willing to help us with both the big and the little tasks of traveling and taking care of our kiddos, etc, and for time with good friends where we can pick up where we left off.

Thankful for a fun and memorable time to celebrate the Fourth of July with our sons as we took the two of them out for a special night of ice cream treats and fireworks at a nearby beach while the girls slept soundly under the watchful eyes of Grandma and Grandpa.  Sitting on a picnic blanket at the beach with our boys sprawled across our laps, chatting about which fireworks were our favorites (Sammy liked all the red ones and Micah like the ones that "looked like hair"), and wishing America a Happy Birthday, I couldn't help but file that memory away in my "life is so good and rich" folder.  I just love being a mama.  And I love experiencing life with my children.  I am excited to make memories with them that they will carry into their parenthood one day just as I have carried my memories into mine.

my attempt to capture the moment without missing it

Continuing to be thankful for summer and all of the sun we've been able to soak up as we play with friends and cousins, swim in the beach, play in the sand, run around outside, eat ice cream, go to the parade, and have family barbecues.

 

Thankful today and wanting to be thankful always...

What are YOU thankful for today?

T Ball or Not T Ball?

Today was the last day of t-ball.  Micah will go on to play in a t-ball "league" starting next week, but today, I called to withdraw Sammy from the next session.  Micah loves t-ball with his easy-going spirit and happy self, but Sammy, on the other hand, notsomuch.  Each week, when they called Sammy's name for attendance, he instantly started to cry, fearful of doing t-ball without us at his side. 

He is my tenderhearted son.  He likes to be close to his Mommy and Daddy and likes things to follow in his normal and comfortable routine.  He attends Sunday school, but only with his Micah, and he cries when we leave to go on a date, even if we are just leaving him with his super-safe grandparents.  

How I love this sweet boy of mine, and can I tell you a secret?  I am rather fond of his attachment to us.  I am, in fact, trying to soak it up, because, after all, he will one day have no problem launching out into the world without us.

There is this line we mamas must ride of gently pushing our children towards independence and confidence and letting them stay close to us until they're comfortable.  I have a feeling that different seasons and different children call for different actions.  I love the times when you just know what your child needs, and this summer, I knew that my Sammy needed me to stand in the field with him, stand three feet away while he hit the ball, and run to first base with him.  I also knew that he needed me to cancel his next session of t-ball because he would rather be playing at the park or cheering for his brother from the bleachers.  And for this, I am thankful.  I am thankful that I knew what he needed, and I am glad I can choose to go with it and to let him call the shots for this time.

Sammer Jammers, I am proud of you for completing what you started and for working hard (with Mommy or Daddy by your side) to play t-ball for the first time!  The look on your face when you received your medal was priceless...you were so proud!  Here's to marking your first medal and celebrating the unique YOU that our good God blessed us with.  Love you, son.

Sammy and I about to run the bases together...can you tell how thrilled he is about the prospect?

Sammy was SO proud of his medal.

Micah and Sammy with their medals (red faces are due to the 100 degree temperatures we were surviving in!)

The boys with their #1 fan...

Thankful Thursday

We are thankful today for many things, both big and small...for family and relationships, for the joy and peace that comes from knowing Jesus and his love, and for the everyday moments of enjoying life...such as games, meals together, playing with friends, yummy treats, and baby smiles...

Sammy's Gifts
-that we're going to watch the Muppets movie
-Candyland and Chutes and Ladders
-Daddy
-Mommy
-Sophia, that we have a new baby

Micah's Gifts
-that I went to Florida
-Nana and Papa
-the picture on the wall that has my brothers and sister on it
-Sophia
-for you and that you look pretty (melt!)
-Ella

Ella's Gifts
-Daddy
-Mommy
-Phia (I hope I always remember how precious her voice is calling her sister, "Phia.")
-Ella

My Gifts
-a happy, precious baby girl who smiles easily and melts my heart daily (and who weighed in at 16 pounds, 4 ounces at her four-month well visit, which is the 90th percentile!!!)
-air-conditioning...it is SUCH a hot day and I keep thanking God for our air!
-playdates, park days, and a stay-at-home day, too
-children who (most of the time) love to play together
-Ella's amazingly adorable singing...she has been singing "Happy Birthday to you," and "We love you, we do" over and over for many days now.  I absolutely love it.  It is such sweet music to my ears.
-ice cream cone date with Micah (on the couch while the others napped)
-a God who loves me at all times, even in my weaker, impatient moments with my kiddos
-free Redbox movies...hence, family movie night tonight!

What are you thankful for today?